If I said being here was easy, I would be lying....

My goodness....so many days between posts, I just know I am forgetting some things....first thing first....Just yesterday, I was able to travel to Byumba just north of the city. The bus ride there was absolutely amazing!! Talk about "land of a thousand hills," this place is gorgeous, especially when you get out of the city! There were layers upon layers of mountains, where you could see rows of how they cultivate the land on the hills to grow crops. Hills are just covered with bananas, sugar cane, cassava, sorghum, and potatoes, with the low lying areas covered with tea and rice fields. None of the pictures I took do this countryside any justice. I learned what is apparently a famous saying, "God roams the world during the day, but sleeps in Rwanda;" and having been here, I can see why.....

So, at any rate, this trip to Byumba was to participate in a run in conjunction with a run in the US. In Colorado, my sister was participating in Run for Rwanda, sponsored by a church in its third year fundraising for a medical clinic in Byumba. Ever since I found out about the run when I was back in the states, I knew I was going to participate in the simultaneous run in the small town, Kibali. So, another volunteer here with me, Tori, joined me on the journey. In contacting the pastor of the town, I was put in touch with a phenomenal woman, Peg, who is affiliated with the church in Colorado and travels around Rwanda on behalf of the church, working on development projects in various areas. She met Tori and I yesterday afternoon in Byumba. Although much of the community was preparing for the run, we were able o sit, the three of us, and learn about the incredible history of the community in Kibali and how the church there has established various projects that Colorado's sister church has been able to help provide funding for. It is really a remarkable relationship. By about 3:30pm here, we were picked up by Pastor Robert and taken on an extremely bumping ride to Kibali - the start time was due for 4pm here, but because of the morning being used to clean to prep for voting tomorrow, we were a little behind schedule. It was an incredible feeling - Peg on the phone in this small car talking to race directors in Colorado Springs, asking for a 10 minute delay - as a runner, I know that runners don't particularly like delays, but because of the uniqueness of this run, I guess some exceptions were made. Here in Kibali, the runners were in various groups, the first being the boys ages 12-30 (or something like that). But the directors wanted Jenn and I to start at the same time, so I was able to start with that first group. We arrived just after 4 and as we jumped out of the car, the Bishop was on the phone with directors in Colorado, and he begin a prayer....at the end of the prayer, we were off! And let me tell you, these boys can RUN!! The beginning was so incredibly emotional for me, in a selfish sense, knowing that this was one time where I knew both Jenn and I were doing the exact same thing, thinking of each other...talk about bridging the gap between two continents - it was an amazing feeling! But it took just a few tears and a couple selfish moments to remember the big picture - my sister and I almost symbolically representing the single human family, spread across two continents, working together at the exact same time to help achieve one common goal - building a medical clinic. It was overwhelming...with tears coming down my face, I ran with children on both sides of me, telling me, I am sure, to keep running....probably thinking it so funny that I was so far behind all the others! :-) and then the hills - the amazing hills - it took my breath away....there are really no words to explain the intense emotions running through me. For 5 kilometers, I watched children of all ages, running on a dirt and rocky path, most of which had no shoes at all, or only flip-flops if they were lucky...and they were running with each other, for their own community - and not just children! The old women who ran by me, cheering me on, with eyes wide and smiles spreading ear to ear - saying words I could not understand, but knowing they were supporting my run, just the same - the first muzungu to participate in Run for Rwanda....and the people on the sides of the road!!! I passed them all shouting "miriwe" - good afternoon.....and their laughter and cheering - I would not have been surprised if I had finished with dusty teeth because I could not stop smiling the entire time! Turning the corner halfway, the ease of the downhill quickly became a huge challenge as I was fighting uphill for half the run. But I did the entire thing with the same children waiting for me as I slowed, speeding up with me as I gained strength - their support for me was far more than I would have ever dreamed of - it was incredible.....and the amazement didn't stop there. Upon finishing, the crowd was waiting for the Bishop to cross the finish line - he had decided just the day before that he would participate when Peg offered to find him sponsors - it was such an incredible thing for the community to t\see their bishop supporting the run by actually running the same course with them. We all had so much fun seeing the Bishop so proud of his first place finish in his category - being he was the sole runner in his category :-) As everyone crossed the finish line, we were all gathered together to sit in a huge field overlooking the hills, as we prayed, waited for distribution of water or coca cola or fanta, enjoying the company of those around us, and concluding with the presentation of the awards. Near the end, they asked me to stand and introduce myself and explain why I was there....I was terrified I wouldn't have the words, but just saying how I was running with my twin, representing our one family working towards a common goal, the smiles lit up their faces and hands were clapping...I was so happy we all understood; we all felt the same connection....it was truly inspiring to see what we can all do when we collaborate together...

This morning we were invited to attend church in Kibali. As the community has outgrown its mud-rick chapel, we all gathered on benches outside, under the hot Rwanda sun, high on the hills with the occasional breeze rustling in the trees - there was a presence there that was just overwhelming! The two-hour plus service began with some singing and dancing by various groups, one of which Tori and I stood to dance along with the teenagers. What a truly enjoyable moment - sharing in their praise and appreciation for all things around them. Again, there are so many more ways to communicate than words - we don't speak a common language, but we all could share our joy and spirit through dance and song :-) This particular service also included a special offering since it is the time of the harvest....following the monetary offering, the women and children walked back up the hill to the chapel and retrieved their baskets filled with what they could offer the community from their recent harvest. After all the baskets were presented to Pastor Robert, they were opened and you could see that sorghum was the primary crop of this harvest....Pastor walked through blessing each basket and then blessing each individual who brought one down. It was really quite moving. The community works together to help redistribute these offerings to the 30 most vulnerable families in their community. It was really quite a special occasion to be a part of, especially when we found out they only do this type of offering twice per year! And the morning wrapped up with a tour of the clinic that has made remarkable progress since the fundraising began in 2007, making rooms for pre-natal care, the maternity ward, and other hospital-type rooms. And to know that members of that community worked together to get the buildings up; still much to be finished, but the progress is truly remarkable.

It is easy to just take in everything happening around me, but when I think about life, that these women and men work every day in their fields, day in and day out, working towards a common vision for their community, it moves me to tears. And it is hard, too, when I watch the children and see their smiles, and hold their hands, and pat their heads and I think to myself of the life they have, experiencing hardships I will not even be able to fathom, and to see the resilience and sense of community that binds them together, and experiencing the immense hospitality and generosity they show to their guests - it, too, is so moving and fills me with more questions than answers. Every day that I actually think about the differences in our lives, I cannot help but be baffled by the indifferences in this world. And I am realizing slowly by slowly, buhoro buhoro, that I will never be able to understand....and unfortunately I have to let that be okay.

Moving on from this weekend, last week at Gisimba, I was able to really begin tackling my own fears of failure and started working with one particular boy, Danifique, probably about 11, tutoring him in English. Thursday I started by trying to get a sense of his understanding of the alphabet, going over letters and sounds, and coming up with words. Friday I used some basic books - first having him read a simple one to me, and then moving on to a few Spot books with slightly bigger words. What I discovered is that he has been taught fairly well to read, but comprehension is about nil...I discovered this by pointing to pictures asking, What is this, or What color is this and his response was a blank face. So, realizing he doesn't even really know what I am saying, but the end of Friday, I was able to teach him six colors and six words, as he demonstrated to me at the end of the session by matching the right color to the right word! I was so proud of him!! While I was working with him, I had gotten things like playdough and coloring books for the younger other kids; when it was time for his break, it was so cool to see that he didn't ant to go color; he was practicing writing words to the alphabet!!! :-) This was the joy of my week! That afternoon, I was walking around and started talking to some younger girls. Well, what you have to understand is their English is VERY basic, so talking usually consists more of gestures and repeating basic words and pointing. A any rate, I sat down with another young girl and started reading with her. I realized the same thing - these kids have been taught pronunciation, but they don't know what they are reading. It was a book about a diary of a worm, and it was soooo fun to explain to them through gestures and words the translation of the story - to see their eyes light up in understanding is just so exciting!!

I still feel nervous thinking about my planning my days there. It really seems to be up to each volunteer to decide what they ant to do there, day by day. There is very little direction, but I am enjoying spending time teaching. Without any experience, I am just trying to learn some things from other volunteers here who are teachers and to know I can borrow more books from them also helps. I always seem to have that little butterfly in my tummy, the fear that I will do something wrong or miss an opportunity. It is challenging for me to have so little structure, but I understand it is very good for me, as well - not only are the children hopefully learning and growing, but I, too, am learning about my limits and trying hard to expand them, buhoro buhoro...

Speaking of expanding my limits.....we have been without water at the guesthouse since Tuesday. They bring in jerry cans for us to use to shower, but it is challenging to find the best ways to brush our teeth and wash our hands without wasting water...To both help conserve, and due to the regular challenge of washing hair during a bucket bath, not to mention when there is a limited supply of water, I went from from Monday night to last night not washing my hair...and last night, it was so funny, because being in the hills it was actually very cold outside, so although I was THRILLED to having water pouring from a shower head, it was cold as ice!!!! LOL You really learn to count your blessings and appreciate the small things here... :-)

There are many other random thoughts, but here I have been over an hour and still emails to catch up on...every days is an opportunity to observe and learn and value life and love....It has really been more challenging for me than I thought it would be....I'm trying hard to let go of expectations and just live in the moment - there really isn't any other way...